I've been at the new job almost 2 weeks. It's been going...the learning curve is big and I'm struggling a bit. As for my Mr. Big aka the Colonel, he has fallen off the grid. It was to be expected though, but I HATE it! I hate being rejected--don't we all....
He's not returning phone calls or emails at this point, my favorite, Radio Silence. As a certain college roomie stated when I told her about Mr. Big-the return, he was totally unavailable back then and likely would be again. And.....she was right again. Hate it when that happens. Why couldn't we just have had a wham, bam, thank you ma'am and he not mention all the lovey dovey crap? One nighters, while not ideal, can work for me. What can I say--it had been a while. Just need to have that expectation out right...Boo.
What makes it more challenging is that Mr. Big involved the whole family--well not entire--only mom, dad, 2 sisters, and me. There are a total of 6 brothers and sisters including me. Still, it's a third and I know I'll be getting some pointed questions come Christmas time. Annoying.
Not remembering all that lovey crap I wrote a week ago...
Monday, December 13, 2010
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
The Old Loves
As you might have noticed, I have been MIA for the past few weeks. Granted, I had a good date a few weeks ago...that of course, went no where because of my shenanigans in the cars aka I am white trash....
However, I have great news! I have a new JOB! For those that have known me for several years, you know that this has been a long time coming. I have a new position in International Marketing and my market is China! All those years and money are starting to pay off! Finally! ~ YIPPEE!!
Back on topic, this past Thanksgiving, I saw a past boyfriend/love/someone I've had a thing with for as long as I can remember in adulthood. We dated when I was 24 and he was 44. Obviously now, I am 30 and he is 50. We have remained friends over the years and attend the same function each Thanksgiving. In fact, he's had Thanksgiving dinner with my family and I for several years. So he's "in" so to speak. Mom and Dad know him and love him though they are a bit concerned on how much we pick. And I mean tease each other. This past weekend seemed (at least to me) to be different. We were kinder, more loving, and had more serious talks about the future. Now, my college roommate will poignantly point out he would not commit exclusively 6 years ago and that was part of the reason we didn't last. And maybe it felt different this year as I am in a different place: I have a new place (out of the farm house FINALLY~hell yeah!); I have a big girl job FINALLY(~hell to the f*** yeah!); and I am actually ready to settle down and think about (ummmm..yes...) a husband, family, and children. Did I write that...yes, I really feel that way.
On some level, he is my version of a knight in shining armor...he is decorated in the military and of rank, he comes from the right family, he has the same goals and aspirations, we like the same things...and while going down a check list so to speak, he makes me laugh and makes me feel special and beautiful and all those tingly things...yes, he is significantly older but honestly, I like that. He feels 100% MAN. There is no boy. That's nice--more than nice and makes me feel safe and cared for.
So even if I was just living the fairy tale week of my life another year with my knight, it was so well worth it. I just need to remember this if I get rejected again and I sure hope that is not the case. I hope it ends with roses, bells, and rings.
Who is this writing....I'm not sure it's myself...but HELL YEA I got the job and the place even if I don't get the man!
However, I have great news! I have a new JOB! For those that have known me for several years, you know that this has been a long time coming. I have a new position in International Marketing and my market is China! All those years and money are starting to pay off! Finally! ~ YIPPEE!!
Back on topic, this past Thanksgiving, I saw a past boyfriend/love/someone I've had a thing with for as long as I can remember in adulthood. We dated when I was 24 and he was 44. Obviously now, I am 30 and he is 50. We have remained friends over the years and attend the same function each Thanksgiving. In fact, he's had Thanksgiving dinner with my family and I for several years. So he's "in" so to speak. Mom and Dad know him and love him though they are a bit concerned on how much we pick. And I mean tease each other. This past weekend seemed (at least to me) to be different. We were kinder, more loving, and had more serious talks about the future. Now, my college roommate will poignantly point out he would not commit exclusively 6 years ago and that was part of the reason we didn't last. And maybe it felt different this year as I am in a different place: I have a new place (out of the farm house FINALLY~hell yeah!); I have a big girl job FINALLY(~hell to the f*** yeah!); and I am actually ready to settle down and think about (ummmm..yes...) a husband, family, and children. Did I write that...yes, I really feel that way.
On some level, he is my version of a knight in shining armor...he is decorated in the military and of rank, he comes from the right family, he has the same goals and aspirations, we like the same things...and while going down a check list so to speak, he makes me laugh and makes me feel special and beautiful and all those tingly things...yes, he is significantly older but honestly, I like that. He feels 100% MAN. There is no boy. That's nice--more than nice and makes me feel safe and cared for.
So even if I was just living the fairy tale week of my life another year with my knight, it was so well worth it. I just need to remember this if I get rejected again and I sure hope that is not the case. I hope it ends with roses, bells, and rings.
Who is this writing....I'm not sure it's myself...but HELL YEA I got the job and the place even if I don't get the man!
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